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Highs & Lows

Coronavirus has kicked my butt!  My grandson was in the children’s hospital for two days, and now he is back home.  He tested positive for coronavirus, so we have slept much more than expected.  David still has a cough, but he got secondary pneumonia on top of all his other health problems.  Life at home isn't back to normal, but our quarantine is over tomorrow, so I pray we get out of the house some next week.  My favorite season is here, and the weather has been much cooler.  I pray I get to work again in the future, but right now, watching my grandsons use my spoons up every day.  

I did hear through the grapevine that my dad and stepmom have been having dinner with Ashely.  I was also told Ashley spent father's day with her biological father.  

I was pleased to get this news because it means everyone has gone on with their lives, and they are letting me live mine.  Months ago, I told you once everyone had their job outside of the music stores, I felt profound relief. I am no longer responsible for anyone, and my decisions are based on what I want for my life.  I understandably have financial limits because I am disabled, but I love myself and my life.  

On a much somber note, it has been a horrific time for my baby girl.  Please please keep her in your prayers.  Not only did she have the virus, but she lost a baby.  She didn’t even know she was pregnant.  She has been out of work taking care of herself and her three-month-old son.

On top of that, her ex decided after denying his child and being completely absent, that he now has money to file for 50/50 custody, so she was served with papers this week.  Her boyfriend also hit the road because he can’t be honest.  She keeps her head up despite all the pain, and she went out with her girlfriends to take some time to herself.  

The rest of the family, from what I hear, have been doing good.  These days I have to turn to Facebook to know what’s going on.  Folks don’t visit much, especially if they hear the word coronavirus.  I don’t blame them.  This virus makes loneliness much worse!  

I pray all is well with you and your family.

Much Love- Tina 


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We have to stop meeting like this....

Tonight I talked to myself.  I said,” self, why do you feel the way you do?”  Then I said,” self, we have to stop meeting like this because it's one o'clock in the morning”!  I laughed because regardless of the predicament I find myself in, sometimes I don't understand why I do the things I do. Have you ever had a random thought and wondered, “why did I think about that?.  I try to ignore my random thoughts and feelings, but sometimes they just come out when I least expect it. Example 1 ~ When I forget to take my medication, I feel everything.  The depression, sadness, and pain flood in, and all I can do is cry myself to sleep. Example 2 ~ I was watching season three of Anne with an E tonight, and it hit me.  I was crying and feeling very sad.  I should be happy because it was a beautiful ending. However, my mind was thinking about how they loved each other in their youth and found each other again. Right now, in my life, love songs and anything sappy makes me cry.

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Beauty in the chaos

Early voting started Friday, so I went to town and voted in the States Primary.  It was a peaceful drive, and then Friday night, we watched the movie 2012. There are so many theories and conspiracies floating around online that the movie made me think about all of them. My thoughts quickly turn to religion and how none of us know when our lives will end. Humanity has gotten it wrong, so many times, and religious leaders continue to attempt to guess, but even the Bible says no one knows. One thing that I know for sure is the earth is a breathtaking place, and I continue to find small glimpses of its beauty amidst the chaos.  Just yesterday, we went to Fall Creek Falls State Park, and I took a dip in the cold water. Families and children were everywhere, laughing and playing.  You would never think that the USA is in an uproar. I saw no signs of social distancing or a pandemic.  I didn't see any mask.  Men were walking their dogs, and the beautiful smells of wood burning flo