Thanksgiving 2021

Good Morning and Happy Thanksgiving. I am here in Cookeville visiting my family. We had our dinner yesterday because my sister had to work today. I have had so much fun with my nieces and nephews, so I should be happy and thankful...right? I am sad to report that I am depressed. I miss David so much and I know he would want me to be happy, but I want to run home and lock out the world. I hate for people to see me cry especially when they are having a good time.

Well, I have to cheer up because my son is getting married on December 1, 2021, to an amazing young woman who has become a daughter to me. It will be another reminder that I am alone but my niece offered to be my plus one and she is so excited.

On the dating scene, I am about to give up. I have spoken to more men than I ever wanted to and the dates have been horrible. I have a story to write about it, but it just keeps getting worse. I fell in love with Nicolas but he couldn't or wouldn't reciprocate my feelings. The decision not to date is rather easy after everything I have encountered. I spent an hour deleting numbers and blocking men on Facebook. I just do not care to hear their spill anymore. It is all smoke and mirrors. The lines get worse and worse with each hello in my chatbox. Are there any men left that want to love a good woman? I pray that there is because right now I feel hopeless.

Much Love

Tina Louise

Comments

We have to stop meeting like this....

Tonight I talked to myself. I said,” self, why do you feel the way you do?” Then I said,” self, we have to stop meeting like this because it's one o'clock in the morning”! I laughed because regardless of the predicament I find myself in, sometimes I don't understand why I do the things I do. Have you ever had a random thought and wondered, “why did I think about that?. I try to ignore my random thoughts and feelings, but sometimes they just come out when I least expect it. Example 1 ~ When I forget to take my medication, I feel everything. The depression, sadness, and pain flood in, and all I can do is cry myself to sleep. Example 2 ~ I was watching season three of Anne with an E tonight, and it hit me. I was crying and feeling very sad. I should be happy because it was a beautiful ending. However, my mind was thinking about how they loved each other in their youth and found each other again. Right now, in my life, love songs and anything sappy makes me cry.

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My Reality

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Sitting in my Chair

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