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Daily Chatter

People are bickering over the Coronavirus, Wallstreet, President Trump, and the next election.  I spent the day at home, getting used to my new medicine.  Yesterday I got a surprise visit from my new Mental Health case manager, and that went rather well.  Then the new Dermatologist from Vanderbilt called in 90 days of two antibiotics to treat the Hidradenitis Suppurativa (Clindamycin and Rifampicin).  So on top of the new diuretic, I now have two new potent antibiotics.  A few months ago, the doctor increased my narcotic pain medication and my Zoloft.  I am so sick of pills.  I just want to feel better and feel happy again.  My grandson brings me laughter every day, but the pain hits me when I least expect it.  On the upside, I am losing weight, but I will have ugly extra skin to deal with once this is over.  My insurance refused to pay for Taltz or Cosentyz, so I have no other choice but to try what's available.

The outpouring of love and support for the Tennessee tornado victims has been mind-blowing.  I have cried some happy tears over the stories I have been reading online.  Well, it's time to get some sleep.



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We have to stop meeting like this....

Tonight I talked to myself.  I said,” self, why do you feel the way you do?”  Then I said,” self, we have to stop meeting like this because it's one o'clock in the morning”!  I laughed because regardless of the predicament I find myself in, sometimes I don't understand why I do the things I do. Have you ever had a random thought and wondered, “why did I think about that?.  I try to ignore my random thoughts and feelings, but sometimes they just come out when I least expect it. Example 1 ~ When I forget to take my medication, I feel everything.  The depression, sadness, and pain flood in, and all I can do is cry myself to sleep. Example 2 ~ I was watching season three of Anne with an E tonight, and it hit me.  I was crying and feeling very sad.  I should be happy because it was a beautiful ending. However, my mind was thinking about how they loved each other in their youth and found each other again. Right now, in my life, love songs and anything sappy makes me cry.

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Beauty in the chaos

Early voting started Friday, so I went to town and voted in the States Primary.  It was a peaceful drive, and then Friday night, we watched the movie 2012. There are so many theories and conspiracies floating around online that the movie made me think about all of them. My thoughts quickly turn to religion and how none of us know when our lives will end. Humanity has gotten it wrong, so many times, and religious leaders continue to attempt to guess, but even the Bible says no one knows. One thing that I know for sure is the earth is a breathtaking place, and I continue to find small glimpses of its beauty amidst the chaos.  Just yesterday, we went to Fall Creek Falls State Park, and I took a dip in the cold water. Families and children were everywhere, laughing and playing.  You would never think that the USA is in an uproar. I saw no signs of social distancing or a pandemic.  I didn't see any mask.  Men were walking their dogs, and the beautiful smells of wood burning flo