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Richard read my blog today and said I didn't seem to have my priorities straight.  He said I wasn't alone because I have an abundance of family and friends.  That is partly true, but I have to say that in two years I can count on my hand the number of families who have come to visit.  Teresa is the only friend to make the trip and honestly, it has shown me who my friends are in this world.  I spent 30+ years running the roads for my friends.  My son and youngest daughter are the only ones to visit me from my family.  I hear all the excuses about gas prices and how they work and I don't, but I worked for years!  I wore out vehicles helping folks, so what is one visit to Wartburg?  Anyway, I am not upset because I have grown to enjoy my solitude.  The loneliness I speak about comes when you roll over to touch someone in the middle of the night and it is void! I am craving the affection and love of a God-fearing, strong, man.  Is that wrong?  Is it so wrong to want to be a wife?  Share your thoughts in the comments.

Much Love
Tina Louise


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We have to stop meeting like this....

Tonight I talked to myself.  I said,” self, why do you feel the way you do?”  Then I said,” self, we have to stop meeting like this because it's one o'clock in the morning”!  I laughed because regardless of the predicament I find myself in, sometimes I don't understand why I do the things I do. Have you ever had a random thought and wondered, “why did I think about that?.  I try to ignore my random thoughts and feelings, but sometimes they just come out when I least expect it. Example 1 ~ When I forget to take my medication, I feel everything.  The depression, sadness, and pain flood in, and all I can do is cry myself to sleep. Example 2 ~ I was watching season three of Anne with an E tonight, and it hit me.  I was crying and feeling very sad.  I should be happy because it was a beautiful ending. However, my mind was thinking about how they loved each other in their youth and found each other again. Right now, in my life, love songs and anything sappy makes me cry.

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Beauty in the chaos

Early voting started Friday, so I went to town and voted in the States Primary.  It was a peaceful drive, and then Friday night, we watched the movie 2012. There are so many theories and conspiracies floating around online that the movie made me think about all of them. My thoughts quickly turn to religion and how none of us know when our lives will end. Humanity has gotten it wrong, so many times, and religious leaders continue to attempt to guess, but even the Bible says no one knows. One thing that I know for sure is the earth is a breathtaking place, and I continue to find small glimpses of its beauty amidst the chaos.  Just yesterday, we went to Fall Creek Falls State Park, and I took a dip in the cold water. Families and children were everywhere, laughing and playing.  You would never think that the USA is in an uproar. I saw no signs of social distancing or a pandemic.  I didn't see any mask.  Men were walking their dogs, and the beautiful smells of wood burning flo