I used to believe that I had to be in a relationship and have that status of belonging to someone. That analogy took me to some dark places over the last two years. I didn't think I mattered without a “grandpa”. There was a time when one of my grandchildren even asked me if I had found a “new grandpa”. David left some big shoes to fill but let us face it....no one could ever fill his shoes! He was irreplaceable! He left his legacy in the children we raised and every time I see one of the grandchildren I see his spirit. So where does that leave me? I can't replace David or fill this dark hole. Now I have to face that he is never coming back. It took me two years and a good friend to face my reality and now maybe the healing can begin. Every step I take alone hurts like hell, but I now have two years of experience under my belt! Always remember none of us grieve the same so be easy with yourself.