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Ups & Downs


After 5 months I broke things off with Richard.  He is a good friend and nice guy but not so good at dating.  I won't go into details but this was the healthiest choice I could make for myself right now.  We live five hours from one another and I learned that I hate long-distance relationships. Anyway enough about that.  

The picture is my Christmas tree this year.  I want to give a special shout out to my neighbors David, Jerry and Vivian for picking it up at the tree farm and helping me decorate my beautiful tree.  It means so much to me!  

Life has calmed down so much since the doctor put me on bed rest.  I was forced to take care of myself and not worry about the rest of the world.  I did spend Thanksgiving away from my family but my neighbors enjoyed my cooking.  I made my first turkey by myself and it was wonderful!  My kids didn't even call me, but my mom, sister and grandson called on Facetime.  Jackson made my day with his surprise call!!!!  It's the little things that make life worth living.  I pray all is well with you this holiday season.  

Much Love

Tina Louise


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We have to stop meeting like this....

Tonight I talked to myself.  I said,” self, why do you feel the way you do?”  Then I said,” self, we have to stop meeting like this because it's one o'clock in the morning”!  I laughed because regardless of the predicament I find myself in, sometimes I don't understand why I do the things I do. Have you ever had a random thought and wondered, “why did I think about that?.  I try to ignore my random thoughts and feelings, but sometimes they just come out when I least expect it. Example 1 ~ When I forget to take my medication, I feel everything.  The depression, sadness, and pain flood in, and all I can do is cry myself to sleep. Example 2 ~ I was watching season three of Anne with an E tonight, and it hit me.  I was crying and feeling very sad.  I should be happy because it was a beautiful ending. However, my mind was thinking about how they loved each other in their youth and found each other again. Right now, in my life, love songs and anything sappy makes me cry.

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Beauty in the chaos

Early voting started Friday, so I went to town and voted in the States Primary.  It was a peaceful drive, and then Friday night, we watched the movie 2012. There are so many theories and conspiracies floating around online that the movie made me think about all of them. My thoughts quickly turn to religion and how none of us know when our lives will end. Humanity has gotten it wrong, so many times, and religious leaders continue to attempt to guess, but even the Bible says no one knows. One thing that I know for sure is the earth is a breathtaking place, and I continue to find small glimpses of its beauty amidst the chaos.  Just yesterday, we went to Fall Creek Falls State Park, and I took a dip in the cold water. Families and children were everywhere, laughing and playing.  You would never think that the USA is in an uproar. I saw no signs of social distancing or a pandemic.  I didn't see any mask.  Men were walking their dogs, and the beautiful smells of wood burning flo