I managed to go to sleep around midnight, but I am still not finished. Brittany brought Kai up to see me, and we had a good time. I love my grandsons so much. Timothy and Stormy have stayed a few nights too. I miss Jackson when he is on his monthly visits with his dad. He would have loved to see Kai.
I went back on social media today for a few hours. It tends to clear my mind, but this evening I had a depression hit me that took my breath. The room was spinning, and I started to cry, and then all the negativity came at me like mini stealth B2 bombers. Things like “you're worthless,” “you haven’t done anything with your life,” and “you make everyone mad” were front and center. The ”who are you to give anyone advice?” and ”just shut up Tina” came like ocean waves. It wasn’t a “feel sorry for me” moment. I felt like shit about myself for a good 30 minutes, and then it passed. Do you ever have attacks like that? Well, I am going to sleep. I love you all!
Tomorrow is a new day.
I went back on social media today for a few hours. It tends to clear my mind, but this evening I had a depression hit me that took my breath. The room was spinning, and I started to cry, and then all the negativity came at me like mini stealth B2 bombers. Things like “you're worthless,” “you haven’t done anything with your life,” and “you make everyone mad” were front and center. The ”who are you to give anyone advice?” and ”just shut up Tina” came like ocean waves. It wasn’t a “feel sorry for me” moment. I felt like shit about myself for a good 30 minutes, and then it passed. Do you ever have attacks like that? Well, I am going to sleep. I love you all!
Tomorrow is a new day.
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