Adults Only. Sensitive Subject. Bad Day.

F**k ~ F**k ~F**k ~ OMG F**k! Yes, that’s what I repeated over and over today in my head as Dr. Clark confirmed......stage three chronic kidney disease.

Yesterday I got fantastic news. No more brain lesions, but today I get knocked down again with the reality that MS continues to ravage my body. Well, at least something is ravaging my body LMAO! I know I have a dark sense of humor, but it keeps me alive.

I don’t use foul language, but let’s be honest! When you have disabilities, and you’ve had them all your life, sometimes you want to say f**k! My dad used curse words my entire life, and because of what I learned from the Bible, I always tried to refrain from using them. However, today I feel that God probably gives us a free pass on the days we lose all sense of reality!

So don’t judge me! I am having a shitty moment, and I hope to be back to myself tomorrow!

I’m tired of the medicine, and I’m tired of the doctors, I’m tired of it all! I’m also tired of one thing making something else worse!

On top of that, now I have to have what’s in the picture below at home because I might overdose!

I love you all!

Tina

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We have to stop meeting like this....

Tonight I talked to myself. I said,” self, why do you feel the way you do?” Then I said,” self, we have to stop meeting like this because it's one o'clock in the morning”! I laughed because regardless of the predicament I find myself in, sometimes I don't understand why I do the things I do. Have you ever had a random thought and wondered, “why did I think about that?. I try to ignore my random thoughts and feelings, but sometimes they just come out when I least expect it. Example 1 ~ When I forget to take my medication, I feel everything. The depression, sadness, and pain flood in, and all I can do is cry myself to sleep. Example 2 ~ I was watching season three of Anne with an E tonight, and it hit me. I was crying and feeling very sad. I should be happy because it was a beautiful ending. However, my mind was thinking about how they loved each other in their youth and found each other again. Right now, in my life, love songs and anythi...

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Engaged

You read it right! I am engaged! Patrick Flatt is my fiancé! Life has changed so much since Christmas. I have never been so in love and felt so much love from any man. Patrick is the mostly loving and kind man that I have ever known. Well except for my grandpa Phil and it would be impossible to completely match my grandpa! We have set a date for September 20, 2026. I pray we will be able to get married in the church my great grandparents (Stevens) started years ago in Monterey, Tennessee. I could write all day about the unselfish love Patrick shows me, but you really have to meet him. Well I am off to spend more time with the grandchildren. Much Love, Tina Louise

Sitting in my Chair

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